The CDC, Schools, and the Babysitter Rule

Putting the loco in In Loco Parentis

Have y’all had a babysitter over lately? If you’re at all like my wife and me, before you head out to date night, you give the sitter a quick lay of the land and go over a few important reminders, the same ones we go over with anyone who watches our kids:

-          Do not send the children out to play in traffic

-          Do not force them to drink any of the household cleaning supplies

-          Do not insist on reading them the latest issue of Penthouse as a bedtime story

-          Absolutely, and this is a strict rule, do not bash the children over the head with any lead pipes

By now, you hopefully realize that I’m joking. In truth, we are blessed with the most wonderful babysitters, responsible and fun and beloved by the children. It would never occur to our sitters to maliciously harm the children – and if my wife or I believed such evil plots lurked in their hearts, we wouldn’t let them within a mile of our house, let alone entrust our brood to their care.

Imagine being worried about some unsavory nanny candidate. Don’t be silly, your neighbor (a lawyer) advises, I’ve got a great solution: have the caretaker sign a contract promising not to poison or molest your toddlers. It is a self-evidently absurd suggestion. No loving parent would ever in a million years willingly leave kids in the care of someone so untrustworthy that they had to be legally threatened not to do harm. The only rules you go over with a sitter involve bedtime and snacking, not beatings and grooming.

Which brings me to your local school. You have by now no doubt heard the CDC has approved adding the Covid vaccine to the routine childhood immunization schedule. I could rant and rave about this for hours, but I’ll spare you. Rather than go over yet again the ever-growing case against pediatric covid vaccine mandates, I wanted to add a different perspective.

Chances are, your child will not end up subject to a covid vaccine mandate next year. So many governors, senators, and other politicians have spoken up this week, promising parents that they will pass legislation prohibiting schools from adopting the CDC’s recommended pediatric covid vaccine mandate. The situation reminds me of the recent laws passed in different parts of the country, preventing schoolteachers from grooming kids or school libraries from stocking sexually explicit material aimed at children.

On the one hand, such legal efforts – whether it’s banning harmful and unnecessary vaccination of children, or banning the sexualization of children – are to be applauded, and I understand why parents across the nation support them. On the other hand, think of the babysitter rule. If your babysitter is so twisted that you have to consistently encourage her not to maim or molest the kiddos, there is no legal contract in the world you could come up with that would give you peace of mind leaving children in her care.

What kind of a school has to be compelled by legislation from giving myocarditis to its students? What kind of a school has to pressured by the power of the law, by the threat of criminal penalty, from turning classrooms into red light districts? If your young child’s teacher is so gung-ho about sharing gender-bending ideology with her class that actual laws have to be passed to keep her from encouraging Chris to dress up as Christine, do you trust her to care for your child even once the legal penalties are in place? Do you trust your school principal to look out for your child’s best interest if the governor has to step in to keep her from subjecting your child to unnecessary medical intervention?

Just some questions to think about the next time you go over bedtime expectations with your favorite babysitter…